Tag Archives: Friends

Happy 2013! I am insane with worry.

Happy New Year! 2012 was a good year for me and I hope 2013 is even better.

Of course, as I say this, I am up with insomnia because of too much worry.  I think the problems will resolve themselves, I just can’t take immediate action which is what is keeping me up.

I have a few things I am obsessing over:

1) School – should I continue?  Do I want to?

2) Time –  School feels like it has sucked my life away.  I feel like my time is precious, I hate not having a life.

3)  Friends – I feel like I am neglecting friends.  I was involved in a conversation the other day about choosing to locate based on career or friends/family.  I chose friends/family and I think that says a lot about my current dilemma.

4) Work –  I am unhappy in my current position, but haven’t looked elsewhere, instead I headed straight to school.  Perhaps I should spend more time on my resume and actually job search.  I do want to be an accountant, but I am not sure the sacrifice is worth it, especially since it means less money and starting at the bottom again.

5) Hobbies –  I have very little time to work on any of the fun things I used to do, including this blog.

6) My Weight –  Keeps creeping up and I am way more out of shape than I used to be.  Heck, I have walked half-marathons, now I walk 1 mile and I am done.  I need more time to get back in shape.


I think all this is leading to a re-evaluation of my priorities.  I would like to work through them now, but since I am now married, they affect someone else and I am letting him sleep!


Need More Hours

I need more hours in my day.  I just can’t seem to find the time to do everything.  I used to not have this problem.  I had done a pretty good job getting everything to balance in years past.  I think I may have to cull parts of my life.  The question is what is going to get cut?



New Career?




Clean House?



My New Husband?

I don’t think it is reasonable to cut any of them at the moment, that may be the problem……Hopefully this is just a temporary swelling of things that need my attention.  October will be better, right?

Funding The Wedding

When we decided to get married, we planned a wedding that we thought we could reasonably afford.  Granted, we could have gone cheaper, but I am glad we didn’t.  The wedding was exactly the way we wanted it.  Luckily, we ended up getting some help from my mom and H’s parents.  In the end it didn’t really cost us as much out-of-pocket as we had planned.

Good thing too, because we ended up having several unexpected house repairs that sucked up the money we originally set aside for the wedding.  We completely lucked out on the generosity of those who love us.

After it was all said and done I think we only ended up paying for our rings.  The rest came from our parents.

As we drove home the day after the wedding, we didn’t feel the pressure of impending wedding bills.  There was no post wedding blues.  While we put effort into planning the event, it didn’t take over our lives and become the focus.  We planned a wedding for us and included those we love.  We talked about how the world felt brighter, how much we enjoyed the wedding,  and having the people who mean so much to us attend.  There were people missing of course, people that we care about, but we set a specific limit and stayed with it.

Inviting people to our wedding rather than having a wedding for others made all the difference.

Our Loved Ones Are Very Generous

We did not register for our upcoming wedding, nonetheless we are receiving generous gifts.  We debated about registering for over and over again, in the end we decided against it for several reasons:

1) We are 30 and 38, not 22 and just starting out.

2) We just combined two complete households and really didn’t need anything.  There are a few wants, but no needs.

3) We just wanted to get married, not do a gift grab.

Regardless, we have received some generous gift cards, cash, and a beautiful bell chime.  I am staying on top of getting our thank you notes out right away.  We are trying to put a lot of thought into writing each note, otherwise why bother.  It isn’t sincere, in my opinion, if it just says thank you.  Although, I admit some cards are easier to write than others.

We deposited the cash into our long-term savings and started using the gift cards for our every day expenses to save some money.  We did make a “new” purchase: a portable carpet cleaner to help clean up dog vomit, urine, etc.  Unfortunately one of our dogs recently ended up with a urinary tract infection…the basement is a bit smelly.

Our family and friends have been very generous and we appreciate it.  It was all unnecessary and we are trying to put the gifts to good use.  One of our friends gave us a gift certificate to our Vet, which given our dog expenses, was used almost immediately!!

Gift Card Heaven and a tree

Last Saturday was my family reunion. We have one approximately every other year, sometimes skipping a year if any big family events occur.  My mom and the rest of “The Sister Army” threw us a small congratulations party on our upcoming wedding.

A few of my friends came out to see me, meet my Fiance, and see each other.  In addition, my Fiance’s family came and met my extended family.  I never realized how hard it is to visit with everyone when you are the center of the event.  I am so used to attending these things, not having them thrown for me.

We had a good time and we were exhausted.  We received several cards, gift cards, and a tree.

Our Gift Card Tree

Ah…the tree…..this tree caused anxiety this week.  While the intention was lovely, planting a tree to grow, like our new future together.  However, it caused me so many problems.

First off, we have no place to put a Maple tree in our yard, our lot isn’t even 1/4 acre and we have three giant trees already.  Second, we hate this house and have no plans to stay here once we are able to escape to something nicer.  Third, it was not a little sapling in a pot, it was a ten foot tree.  A tree I did not want, which then caused me to feel bad about my Grandma spending the money on it.

I was very aware at a young age that we were poor.  My grandma told me I never asked for things directly, never demanded things be bought for me.  In fact, when I wanted something I always said “Grandma, can you afford to buy me X”.  When I received things I didn’t want or need, it made me very sad and upset.  Not because I was spoiled, but because I knew that my family couldn’t really afford it and getting me the wrong thing was wasting money.  I of course didn’t want to hurt their feelings.  I smiled and said thank you, while being in inner turmoil.

BUT…..we really didn’t want a tree. I called a friend and offered it to him, he said he would take it.  But we still needed to haul this heavy tree forty miles from my Aunt & Uncles house.  When I called and explained that we were giving the tree away, they offered to plant it on their property.  Big sigh of relief.  Come to find out this was Grandma’s idea but encouraged by my mom, who said we had nothing in our front yard and could plant it there.

WHAT!  Apparently she hasn’t noticed the two Maples towering over our house.  All in all, the gift left me with a lot of guilt and frustration.  Sadly, this is how I remember most of the gifts I received growing up.  Hence, I really don’t like being given things nor do I like opening gifts in front of people.

Funny thing is, my fiance’s prime “Love Language” is gift giving.

Dave Con Here I Come

It’s Dave Con Weekend!  I will be spending three days playing board games.  Life is good….

Wedding Celebrations

This month starts the series of wedding celebrations.  I am exhausted just thinking about it.

In two weeks we have a shower/celebration during my family reunion.  They carved out a couple of hours for us.

Then we think we have a shower given by my fiance’s parent’s friends, but I am not sure if it is happening.  I was asked to reserve a weekend that they could throw it, but I have heard nothing since.

My boss is taking my co-workers and I to lunch at the end of August to celebrate the nuptials. They wanted to throw me a shower, but I said no thank you.  Those work showers are awkward and I prefer not to be the center of the attention.

Then there is the actual wedding in early September, followed two weeks later, by a reception held by my fiance’s parents for their side of the family.

Then  we are done! Life back to normal…..

  • Single in Debt

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